Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
