Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
