this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
