Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Randomize
