first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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