You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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