I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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