Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize