she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize