i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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