we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Randomize
