i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
