Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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