i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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