Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
His hands were made for my vagina.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
