non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Randomize