i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize