ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
