why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Use "feeling words"
Yay
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize
