Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
