A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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