You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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