just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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