we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
