Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
thus making me awesome and them whores
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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