We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
