I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
