just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
