LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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