You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
