I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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