I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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