Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
