brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
