I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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