D3 body, D1 cock
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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