Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
