i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
