lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
