We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Randomize