You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize