Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I have fence marks all over my body
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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