In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Randomize
