i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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