it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Everclear isn't food dammit
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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