those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Im just a social blackout drinker.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
