Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Randomize