Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
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