did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
