She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
